My sons anger with P +The dead sea

[bluemoon169]

I have just registered today out of sheer desperation on behalf of my 28 year old son who after developing P as you seem to refer to it on here when he was 15.
He suffer es mainly on his face and scalp with the elbows and a patch on his leg.

He is, by all accounts a mild sufferer but psychologically he is now having difficulty coming to terms with his condition and the fact that it appears to be for life.He is showing more and more anger towards us,his parents, for what he perceives to be an inherited condition and the world for staring at him.

I think we need counseling to deal with him and he needs some help also. :'(

I have 2 questions is regarding the dead sea

1.In what way do you benefit from a spell there and how long does the benefit last?
2.If it is a chemical reaction has anyone tried to recreate this situation in a health spa for example?

[HELI-PILOT]

Hi,
Sorry to hear about your son........in my experience the benefit of the Dead Sea is...........sun sun and more sun!!!!!
I visit the DS twice a year and never venture into the salt water, just lap up the sun and it never fails to clear..........the first time for 18 months, then for shorter periods, for some it NEVER comes back, for me it comes back less!
I believe health care professionals have or are currently developing a 'sunbed' that replicates the exact sun as found 1500ft below sea level as in in the Middle East, however for me, being abroad in a 'holiday' atmosphere with other sufferers is a godsend and undoubtedly accelerates the healing process and in fact quite a number of us are currently booking to visit Jordan in April/May so your son is more than welcome to join us............it is money VERY VERY well spent and his skin may stay clear from then on in!
Check out the Dead Sea Jordan post in the 'Recreation Room' and either myself or 'DS Gareth', our 'Tour Operator', would be more than willing to furnish you with more details about our trip to Jordan.
Hope this helps and good luck!
Julian.

[bluemoon169]

Julian

Thank you for your replay it was greatly appreciated.

At this moment in time It is unlikely my son will take up your offer as he is still in the 'why me' phase and is at odds with the world.I have suggested he visits a support group but I think he has surfed the net on this topic and sees no hope.I personnally think he is afraid of seeing someone in a worse condition as he will assume thats how he is going to be affected sooner rather than later.
So you see he still has a lot of 'Demons' to deal with first.

A few more questions:-

1.if sun is the answer and not the waters of the dead sea wouldn't a holiday in Spain do the trick as it is nearer and cheaper?
2.As we are constantly being told the sun is dangerous do you apply sun creams on your holiday at the dead sea to avoid further skin damage?

[HELI-PILOT]

Hello again,

Your first question is probably the most common one that I get asked.

Im certainly no scientist but from what I understand because the DS is 1500 ft below sea level, that extra atmosphere helps filter out some the harmful sun rays allowing the healing rays to work on your skin.
Many do apply sun cream and nearly all apply moisturizers but personally I allow the sun to hit my unprotected skin making sure I take care not to stay out in the sun too long to cause it to burn.

As to your second question, the reason the UK doctors do not recommend the DS is due to the harm the sun can cause but to put it simply, the immediate relief the DS gives Psoriasis sufferers usually outways any complications that may occur in later life due to sun damage!

It has certainly worked for me and although a new 'face on this forum I would certainly recommend that your son spends time on this site to read other peoples experiences and beileve you me there is ALWAYS someone somewhere worse off than you!

Julian.

[mattellie]

Hi Bluemoon,

Your son reminds me of myself many years ago. I too turned on my parents, unfairly blaming them for the state I was in. But, as a young man having just turned 21 I needed someone to blame and they ended up copping for every ounce of anger I had stored up in my body.

Julians replys are excellent but I would just like to add the following...

The sunshine over the dead sea is unique and cannot be found anywhere else in the world - not even 20 minutes away from the sea itself. The minerals in the sea evaporate at an extremely fast rate in the heat, which causes a haze to hang over the sea. This filters the suns rays reducing the ones that cause burning, ageing and cancer allowing safer, prolonged, unprotected sunbathing using nothing other than baby oil. I, and most other peeps, would frazzle in half hour using just baby oil anywhere else in the world.


I hope this helps.

Paul     

[WheelieC]

Hi

My situation was similar to your son's. I got progressively worse for years, since I was about 18, and would get very very down at times, convinced it was going to continue to get worse and worse until eventually i'd be like the singing detective. 

A couple of years ago I was at my wits end and I found this forum.   I took some advice from someone on here, and went to a tanning place in my lunch break.   Just five minutes only on a normal stand-up sunbed.

The effects were instant (i mean instant - by the time I got home that evening it felt different) and caused a quite amazing remission.    Now I need to say that this remission only lasted a week or so, and subsequent visits to the tanning shop have been progressively less effective,  but the important thing for me at the time was that it gave me hope.

I realised that it was possible to control it, at least to an extent.   I have since found other things that help (mainly the constant slapping on of loads of intensive moisturiser), and remain pretty positive about my p, I now keep it stable and it doesn't affect me pyschologically as much.     I try not to use sunbeds now as I realise they are less effective every time, I use them more as an emergency fix, after occasional flare-ups.   

Apparently the DS is much better than a sunbed for all the reasons mentioned above but I would suggest that as a first step you suggest your son goes to a tanning place, it was a real turning point for me.

I was 28 I think when I first went.  If you think it would help I will talk to him, as someone who is same age and has been in the same situation.

[DSG]

Hi there,

I fully understand your situation, I am 30 years old & I got my Psoriasis when I was 7 years old & have had it ever since, i have been through most of the difficulties with this skin condition from being thrown out of my first swimmimg lesson at 8 years old by the instructor because I was scaring the other kids to trying my best to hide my condition during my college years, i even used to wear fingerless gloves in summer to hide this from my college friends. Luckily all my friends thought the glove thing was cool and after the first term fingerless gloves were in fashion as half the college was wearing them!!
Then their was the girl thing & the hangups with getting into relationships, I have to admit still suffer from these same hangups but getting better.

Regards the blame game, i am the same as your son, on many occasions I have looked to blame or taken out my frustrations on my parents as my P is a very much an inherited strain, my father, mother , grandmother & my sister all have psoriasis to some degree!

As to support groups, the most amazing thing for my was my first trip to the Dead Sea when i was 15 years old, i was unsettled at school & ran away because of my insecurites with my skin, when my parents got hold of me they decided to ship me off to the Dead Sea & for the first time in my life I met fellow sufferers outside of my family & it was & still is the most liberating experiance i have had!!!

I go back quite often & this allows me the confidence to keep as grounded as possible & keep my skin in check.

I strongly reccomend giving it a try, some people go & get a great result & the P goes away for long periods or does not come back others go and get cleared up & have to return when the P comes back but either way it helps both with clearing up the P & psycologically.

If you need anymore info on Dead Sea let me know as a load of us are heading out there again in April.

And as Heli & mattellie said the DS enviroment cannot really be replicated

You can always try support groups but my advice is to talk to other sufferers. Like on this forum.

PS  People always tend to take out frustrations & apportion blame when they are in this type of situation but they only do it to people they trust & love so take strength from this, so however bad you feel try & keep you chin up as however tough it seems you are the rock for your son & his shoulder to lean on & you are doing a fantastic job 

PPS Sorry if a waffled a bit too much

Cheers Gareth

 








 

[OOHSUITUSIR!]

Hi there......I have been to the Dead Sea twice....on both occasions I got complete clearance....in my case not long term ....but 4 - 6 months with a bod to bare.

If your son is in need of psychological counselling...the dead sea will not provide it. What the DS for the first time in most sufferers lives  is allow them tio walk around in shorts and t shirts where no one bats an eyelid about their skin.

Up on the roof where we all go in the nuddy , most peeps find someone with a worse case of P than their own....if you are the king...with the absolote worst P, you find yourself going down the rankings as your skin improves and new sufferers arrive!!

The atmosphere IS very supportive, loads of advice ,help and support ....its a real community, if you can afford it get you're son there.....introduce him to this site first, even via internet he can begin to make aquaintances and turning up at the airport at least knowing some people is a bonus.

At the very least I feel confident in saying if he books in for three weeks he will come home the way he was born . CLEAR!!!

You can't do it for him ...tell him to get his ass on this forum and start taking responsibility for his own skin
and start asking for advice!!!!!!

[elgrande]

I'm the same age as your son and went through a similar phase about 3 years ago. I felt very frustrated that my life was going to be dictated to an extent by my condition. It was affecting my work and I felt self conscious more than was healthy. I began to blame it on almost every negative occurrence in my life which simply fuelled my resentment and anger at what was happening. Eventually this led me to become enraged at my parents during Christmas 2005 and accuse them of not caring/understanding/helping etc etc etc. I had so much pent up anger that I actually pulled the door handle clean off when I was trying to storm out! Anyway I eventually calmed and later that night sat down with my dad and had a couple of beers. It was then that he said to me that in life you really have to play the cards your dealt and that success in life is all about making the most of what you are given. I tried to explain to him that it wasn't really a physical problem but psychological, that I was in the prime of my life but every single day without exception, P was on my mind, influencing some my decisions. He then said something which really stuck in my mind; he said do you think time really think time cares about you, its going to march on the same for you as everyone else. You shouldn't waste too much of it worrying. You don't have something which is life threatening and at the end of the day who else really cares what you look like, they are all too wrapped up in their own lives. He basically said I need to appreciate all the things I do have and stop focussing on the negatives. I think the point he was making was that, at the end of the day, life will continue moving forward whether we are happy, unhappy, negative, positive so why not just accept the things we cannot change and make the most of it. I suppose it easier said than done but I do try to remember this philosophy on some of my "bad" days.       

[Andrew1st]

just out of interest how much do you pay to go to the Dead sea and with which operator do you book?

What time periods do you go for?

Thanks,
Andrew